HELP LINE: Use nursing home experiences to make lists

Hearing the story of a friend’s mother’s experiences in the nursing home inspired writer to make lists of her own.

ARE YOU STILL there?

Thank you.

If you’ve been keeping track of where we are, then you know where we are.

If you haven’t … well, suffice it to say that this is the rest of a column by Sidney Cays in response to a column that I did on The Promise:

“But, happy to say, after six months of hard work and speech and physical therapists, Sissy improved enough to return home.

ADVERTISEMENT
0 seconds of 0 secondsVolume 0%
Press shift question mark to access a list of keyboard shortcuts
00:00
00:00
00:00
 

“She was not exactly living alone this time but with a daily ‘chore’ woman, a twice-a-week nurse and an every-Tuesday-and-Friday therapist.

“Plus both Amber and Bennie were in and out every day. And she now spent most of her time in a wheelchair.

“Sissy wasn’t really upset about these additions and changes, because the important thing was that she was home.”

Unfinished business

“But she had unfinished business. One of the first things she did was pick a morning with her daughters for ‘filling in the blanks.’

“She could now make herself understood to them and she explained to them what she wanted to do.

“She told them what she wished their choices at the nursing home had been, and Bennie took notes.

“ ‘A bed near the door — no curtains — and her glasses on always. She was not allergic to glutins and hated oatmeal.’

“They worked out lists. Bennie wrote down all of her PIN numbers and which accounts they were for.

“Amber made a note to get the paperwork to add her to Sissy’s bank account (with name and phone numbers for the banks) and with access at any time.

“She was to get a list of Sissy’s automatic-pay withdrawals.

“There was another list of all who worked for Sissy occasionally: her yardman, the handyman, the pharmacist, the grocery that delivered and their phone numbers.

“They made a list of people who should be notified if anything — another stroke, an illness, a fall — happened again and what they were to tell them.

“And Amber made a list of Sissy’s medications and what they were for.

“Every medical person had asked for this list. Amber and Bennie knew one of her medications she took, but there were three others they hadn’t known about.

“When they were done, they had a detailed series of lists that covered everything they could think of that anyone might need to know if Sissy couldn’t tell them.

“Bennie combined and arranged everything, and put it all together with headings.

“They each took a copy, left Sissy one and made extras. Most of the extra lists had no PIN numbers or bank information and could be given to anyone.

“When they were done, Sissy was smiling, knowing she would never have to eat oatmeal for breakfast again or try for an hour to open one of her accounts with a forgotten password.

“When my friend, Amber, told me about this, I thought about it.”

Story made me wonder

“I wondered if the doctors would know I can’t lie flat in a bed. Or that I have my calcium level checked and often.

“And did anyone know Nadine would take my dogs and Mark Harvey my goat?

“I went home and made a list.”

And there we are. I did edit Nadine’s last name because I don’t have her permission to use it, and if you don’t get the goat reference, never mind; it was so long ago that nobody cares.

I think that Sidney did a pretty darned good job.

And I think that she raises some interesting points.

I also think that we hear a lot about what I think so, what do you think?

________

Mark Harvey is director of Clallam/Jefferson Senior Information & Assistance, which operates through the Olympic Area Agency on Aging. He is also a member of the Community Advocates for Rural Elders partnership. He can be reached at 360-452-3221 (Port Angeles-Sequim), 360-385-2552 (Jefferson County) or 360-374-9496 (West End), or by emailing harvemb@dshs.wa.gov.

More in Life

Keith Ross/Keith’s Frame of Mind
This year’s Honored Pioneers for the 130th Sequim Irrigation Festival, include, from left, Hazel Messenger Lowe, Tim Wheeler, Betty Ellis Kettel and Janet Ellis Duncan.
Honored Pioneers chosen for 130th Irrigation Festival

Four selected to participate in events

KEITH THORPE/PENINSULA DAILY NEWS
Violet Morris, 9, of Port Angeles climbs on "The Rocktopus," a steel, rock and masonry sculpture on Friday  at Port Angeles City Pier. The sculpture was originally designed by artist Oliver Strong as a topiary creation, but was later reworked with stone and mortar by artist Maureen Wall with support from Soroptimist International Port Angeles Jet Set, the City of Port Angeles and the Girl Scouts.
Tentacle tango

Violet Morris, 9, of Port Angeles climbs on “The Rocktopus,” a steel,… Continue reading

A GROWING CONCERN: A few degrees can bee all the difference

I AM SO glad we had several frosts the last 10 days… Continue reading

Doug Benecke will present “Peace Talks” at 10:30 a.m. Sunday. Benecke is the guest speaker at Unity in the Olympics, 2917 E. Myrtle Ave. Benecke will be joined by his wife, Sallie Harrison, for special music.
Program set for weekend service

Doug Benecke will present “Mission Empath-able” at 10:30 a.m.… Continue reading

ISSUES OF FAITH: ‘That fox’ and the journey to Jerusalem

Author’s Note: This column was first preached as a sermon at the… Continue reading

Sunday program set for OUUF

Candace Brower will present “Life as a Game of… Continue reading

The Rev. Pam Douglas-Smith.
Unity in Port Townsend planning for Sunday services

The Rev. Pam Douglas-Smith will present “Enlightened Enthusiasm, Letting… Continue reading

KEITH THORPE/PENINSULA DAILY NEWS
A pair of daffodil blooms poke up from a planter at Lincoln Street and Railroad Avenue on Thursday in Port Angeles. With the coming of spring, flowers are beginning to blossom and trees are taking on their familiar green of the warmer months.
Signs of spring

A pair of daffodil blooms poke up from a planter at Lincoln… Continue reading

Skylar Krzyworz stands outside Walmart on March 7, when she hit the milestone of selling her 25,000th box of Girl Scout cookies. “Girl Scouts has been something that I never realized was going to have such a big impact on me,” she said. “And then after being in it for 13 years, I don’t know what I would do without it in my life.” (Matthew Nash/Olympic Peninsula News Group)
Sequim Girl Scout sells 25,000th box of cookies

High School senior wants to teach abroad

A GROWING CONCERN: Better soil makes for better gardening

WELL, SPRING HAS sprung, the grass is on the rise, as are… Continue reading

At the annual BCHW rendezvous, held earlier this month in Ellensburg, President Dana Chambers gave the President’s Diamond Award to Larry Baysinger in recognition of his outstanding dedication, passion and commitment to the BCHW mission.
HORSEPLAY: Peninsula man wins BCHW Diamond award

BCHW GATHERINGS AND awards were not on his mind, as the longtime… Continue reading

ISSUES OF FAITH: Renew commitment by revisiting what has gathered dust

IT WASN’T EXACTLY spring cleaning, but it was an overdue clearing out… Continue reading